Monday, 23 May 2011

The hardest part

If only we don’t need any secure feeling, Maslow would not put it in the basic pyramid of human’s needs. But he eventually did, because he knows that secure feeling was very important for human beings, more importantly for their relationship with others.

If we don’t need any secure feeling, we would easily trusted everyone who encountered our heart, and would always think that everything would be just fine even if we had to lose someone.

If we don’t need any secure feeling, we would not be wondering. What about? … hell yeah about anything. “I just want to make sure.” Someone said the other day. “You just want to make sure that I love you, right? That I do need you, I care about you and I want you.” The other said, but it was only a heart whisper. "And if you are not sure enough that I love you, then nothing in this world can make you do." The other half heart whispered too.

If we don’t need secure feeling, we would not be afraid of getting hurt as the linear consequence of our love to someone. We would not demand our partner (or future partner) to show us of how much we are loved.

If we don’t need secure feeling, a relationship would not be only and always about 'me'.

But yes, we are only human and we will always have the insecure feelings in any parts of our life. That is normal. The thing is, what you and your partner would do to meet the comfort secure feelings halfway. Of course, one good first step is to feel secure about our self first.  

Here goes the big question, “Can we be loved without even trying to be loved?”
I think the answer is as easy as “Yes, we can, and there is only one way to do it and it is hard I tell you. To never expect.”  Yeah... that is hard. The hardest part.