I miss those

I used to think that I am one of those people who cannot travel alone. Including hanging out to a mall. But then, I tried. I still remember when it was. Right after I finished my violin class on my second year of college. I brought my violin and went to Kinokuniya bookstore, alone.

Amazingly, I felt enjoyed.

Where was the scary feeling?
Where was the awkward feeling when crowds looked at me as if they were thinking something bad about me?
Where was the uneasy feeling of having something unplanned?
Where was the worry?

I did not know why, and how, but they were all gone.
Of course there was a little bit of uneasy feeling. First cut is always the deepest.
But I managed it.

Up to this moment, I am still think that way. That I cannot go alone. But then, life shoves me down my throat to get this life alone, sometimes. Many times, to be exact. Started from a must I travel alone for work, or when things turn solo for me.

Now, it has been a while since I last travel alone or juggle the life solo.
Not that I am not grateful of having my family and spouse around, but honestly I kinda miss those solo moment. Specially the solo traveling part. Because sometimes, I found my hidden self when I travel alone. I felt rejuvenated. I felt blessed of having people around me. I felt glad I met strangers and asked their help to take a photo of me and asked for directions. I was never really alone.

... yea, I miss those.

maybe its time for me to share and give-in to merge myself into others.
Maybe I had enough time dingled-dangled life all by myself.
Maybe I had those moments of me-time in an amazing wonderland, in winter, in the desert, in a turbulence and stormy flight that made me say God's name thousand times.

Yet still I think "I want to be alone" is the biggest lie in the world.

Quiet lake
Bright lights
Groomed to be my travel buddy
Me and my little travel buddy going down town
No stroller for the little traveller


Malicca, I miss you

Malicca, my satellite.

Do you remember when we drove along together on a very night.
And we sang out loud.
Yes, Viva La Vida that was.
Your favorite song.

Do you remember one day when I returned from work half-day
and we spent the rest of the day having pizza and played in the playground?

Do you remember when we went to Bali and spent the evening in the swimming pool watching the sun set? Spent the whole day on the beach, had pizza and tried our first Slurpee ever?
Yes, just the two of us.

Do you remember when we went to Singapore and you pushed yourself to walk along the city just because I forgot to bring your pushchair? And you did it without any complaints.

Do you remember those nights you took care of me when there was no man in the house?
Oh I forgot, you were the man that saved our house from a burnt out!

Do you remember the night when I was so pissed off and you said
"Good nite, tomorrow will be better, Bunda."
"Will you wake up earlier to school so I don't have to scream out loud just to hurry you up?"
And you did wake up without being fussy and you made me smile that day.

A man who keep his words, you are.

And now seeing you sick like this; breaks my heart and tore it apart.
"What have I not done?"
"What have I done wrong?"
If only I could be the one with the never-ending cough, short breath with lips turning blue, I would.
If only I should be the one with the bitter ventolin, I would.
If only I should be the one with the hurting nasal spray, I would too.
Because I only want you to swallow your dream.

Get well soon, baby. 


Malicca's first date

On Friday night, you told me this.

"Bunda, besok main ke rumah Aurel ya."
"Just you? or with your other friends?"
"Only me."
"Well, I don't know where she lives."
"I know."
"Really, how do you know?'

"Jadi gini, tadi pas go home time Titan kan gandengan sama Aurel. Terus Titan bilang
'Aurel Aurel, besok main ke rumah kamu yuk!'
Kata Aurel 'Ayuk!'
'Tapi rumah kamu dimana?'
'Di Permata Mediterania, Jalan Garden 2 nomor 2'
'Oh yang ada tempat berenangnya itu ya? Nanti kita berenang ya!'
'Iya' kata Aurel.

I kept silent.

At one side, I just could not belive a nearly six years old kid could ask a girl out.
At the other side, oh ... I kinda lazy to find the address and pop out in front of her house and need to say this to Aurel's mom:

"Oh, well, hello... apparently,  our kids ... uhm ... have an appointment. To go swimming together. Uh hmmm..." .... aaaaaaawkwaaaaaaaaaard
But at some point, this is something cute and how could I let my own son down by not letting him go?

"Oh, we'll see" I finally said.

Saturday morning, he asked me when I will drop him to Aurel's.
(My God, you haven't forgot have you.)

So after having his lunch, I took him to the crime scene.
Well, ... not a single sign of 'Jalan Garden 2'
"Good!" I said to myself and did not try harder by asking a security at the gate.

"Maybe she's waiting for me at the sport club, Bunda." Malicca said.
"Very well, Sir."

Still, no sign of appearance.
But he doesn't look sad at all after seeing the pool. Soon he put on his rubber band and jumped off.

Maybe next time, kiddo.
Maybe next time.



A day in a copywriter's life

Dari atas sini, terlihat seorang istri yang sedang memasak tumis dengan penuh antusias. Minyak yang menggolak panas siap menggoseng irisan bawang merah dan bawang putih. Lalu dimasukkannya irisan terasi dan potongan sayur yang sudah dicuci bersih.

“Cih, ... tumis kangkung?!!! Dulu juga aku masak itu.” 

Tiba-tiba terdengar suara wanita lain yang membathin.

“Semua sudah kulakukan untuk masak yang terbaik bagi keluarga. Tapi apa hasilnya?” 

Lanjut wanita itu lagi.

Tiba-tiba wanita yang sedang sibuk memasak itu mengeluarkan satu bungkus bumbu masak ke dalam wajan.

“Apa itu? Bumbu masak Surius? ah... kenapa aku tidak pernah tahu rahasia itu! Ah, seandainya saja aku pakai, mungkin lain lagi ceritanya. aku pasti bisa menjadi istri yang lebih baik. Ibu yang lebih dicintai anak-anak.” 

Kata suara hati itu kembali bergumam.

Camera berputar arah, ternyata yang berbicara adalah seekor cicak yang sedang mengamati seorang Ibu yang sedang memasak di dapur.

Ibu Cicak itu pun kemudian menatap dengan nanar. Tak terasa air mata jatuh di pelupuk matanya.

Tiba-tiba, di dinding terlihat satu ekor cicak lain yang merayap menghampiri cicak pertama


Kata cicak ke dua.

Serta merta cicak pertama terkaget-kaget melihat cicak ke dua. Tak ayal lagi, cicak ke dua segera menghampiri cicak pertama dan memeluknya.

“Suamiku! Demi apa, kita bertemu kembali? Maafkan aku, suamiku. Seharusnya aku bisa memasak lebih enak untukmu dan anak-anak di kehidupanku yang lalu."

Kata Ibu Cicak.

“Maafkan aku juga yang selalu mencela masakanmu.”

Kata Bapak Cicak.

Dan kedua cicak itu pun menangis terharu sambil berpelukan, menyaksikan kebahagiaan keluarga di bawah yang bersuka-cita dengan tumis kangkung mereka. 

Muncullah packshot. Lalu slogan. Tipikal. 


Hello Sunday's sunshine, 
Thank you for allowing us to had breakfast in the backyard. 
Malicca was so happy, 
because it has been a while since our last outdoor breakie
(thanks to rainy season). 

We had risoles and pear this morning. 
Some cups of tea and chocolate milk for the little boy. 

Simple menu yet we got too excited by the sun.

Sunday is the big breakfast day.
Today, we had apple cinnamon french toast, 
egg ham french toast 
and hot cinnamon sorbet.