Skip to main content

Happiness

A dearly friend was having a birthday yesterday. And she spent most of the day pampering herself. Did a massage, bought a pair of jeans and bangles, but I am very sure what matter the most was she enjoyed herself of being 29.

And at the same day, I surrendered myself getting trapped in a bookstore I always love: Kinokuniya, while the rain was pouring hard. There I was, sitting on the floor facing hundreds of books in hobby and craft section with Bono banging my ears. It has been a very long time since I had my Kinokuniya time. The last time I remembered was … maybe eight years ago.

“Happiness is a word for a feeling. Feelings are rarely understood; in a moment they are quickly forgotten and misremembered.” – Dr. Henry Carter, Shrink movie.

Yes, I most of the times lost in things I thought would make me happy. And it turns out, that I was not really happy after all. Instead, a simple thing like being alone for a while and got drown in the ocean of words could really made my day. And I just simply forgot that. Because I have been very busy misremembering things I thought would make me happier.

What is happiness?

Is it true that we will be happy if we know what we want?
Or will we be happy if we manage to differentiate our needs and wants? And which one will make us happier, when we got what we want or when we got our needs fulfilled?

After a journey to my past, I found out that for me; happiness is when I can embrace myself, little me and my alter ego (yes, those are the angels and nemesis deep in me) together. And is when I can forgive myself of not knowing what is happening or what to do.

Happy birthday, Ruri :) Though the first step toward happiness is always the hardest, I know you can do it.

Comments

  1. It's funny that the simplest things are the things to keep you ticking ;)

    Thanks Wuy.
    I guess happiness comes when we're not looking for it. Pico Iyer validated this.

    R

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

love is love. marriage is another thing.

of all the things I ever wondered, ... I think I never wonder whom my kids will be married to. or to picture myself holding grand babies. not just a not yet, I think it is simply too hard to bear and too absurd to think of. but then I promise myself. I promise I will not ever push titan and luna to get married or even if they are married; I will not ask them when to have kids.

many times I wondered that marriage is overrated. and the only reason to get married is not love, but to realise life is too hard to bear when you are all alone. because, however, marriage is a conditional love. hubby once said, marriage is not all fancy and glitter. the lowest it can get is, to keep functioning and it will survive. how both parties can be functional one to another, is another story.

to ariawan, a guy of mine,
the one who always wake me up from my princessy dreams. love you.



Three hours late.

2 AM and I stepped in to the house. Hubby was waiting for me. This was not the first time, and not the latest hour I had ever experienced with over time.

"See you soon Bunda. Or at 8, or at 9, or at 10, or at 11 like you said you would be late." Said my son.

I smiled as I entered the house. I smelled home. I saw my beautiful mess. As I picked up some toys on the floor, I imagined what games the kids had played today. There was a drawing, mini ceramics pots, not too chaotic for kids who were left with nini and aki without nannies.

I also saw their time tables, with some check marks on the list. Those that they weren't checked was the responsibility to wash their own dishes. I saw some dirty cups piling up. I saw the microwave's door left half-opened, a baking sheet and a knife. I wonder what they have cooked.
I also saw minecraft was in active window and some search on youtube and google.

Getting home in this hour and not seeing their faces but seeing all the mess the…

Life. Just like what I wanted.

Tiga belas bulan yang lalu, saya memutuskan untuk kembali bekerja setelah 2,5 tahun jadi freelance (tapi lebih banyak free-nya sih hahaha). Satu-satunya yang bikin saya merasa harus bekerja ya cuma Apple. Sisanya, banyak project yang saya tolak-tolakin karena males aja sih intinya. Belaguk bangetlah pokoknya.

Setelah merasa udah nggak produktif lagi di rumah, otak berasa tumpul dan rasa percaya diri udah nyungsep, saat itulah saya terima tawaran untuk kembali ke advertising. Banyak yang nyinyir sih, menganggap industri itu gelap banget dan ngapain udah enak-enak di rumah kok ya balik ngantor. Alasannya cuma satu: bosen di rumah.

Enggak tahu hal baik apa yang telah saya lakukan dalam hidup, ternyata saya dianugerahi tim yang baiiiiik banget. Anaknya manis-manis, good attitude dan yang paling penting; penuh tanggung jawab. Saya ngerasa banyak belajar dari mereka. Mulai hal baru di luaran sana sampai cara pakai krim mata. Enggak sedikit juga kesedihan yang kita tanggung bareng-bareng, da…